


Bug-Dog Creole

by ValiantBarnes (Cimila)



Category: Dreaming of Sunshine - Silver Queen
Genre: Gen, Humour, Team Bonding
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-31
Updated: 2020-08-31
Packaged: 2021-03-07 03:00:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,838
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26209837
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cimila/pseuds/ValiantBarnes
Summary: As it turns out, many of the techniques that Kurenai's team need to learn to become a solid hunting/tracking team are also...Kurenai heaves a sigh, head down on the bar, watching Anko refill her shot glass...good for stalking.Kurenai was not given a team of three respectable Clan kids. Oh no. She got a trio of weird gremlins who spend a month and a half making a barking, chittering creole and then use what could be an amazing field advantage to stalk Hinata's crush and then Kiba's... whatever that Sai kid is.
Comments: 21
Kudos: 280
Collections: Dreaming of Sunshine Exchange 2020 A, Heliocentrism — a Dreaming of Sunshine recursive collection





	Bug-Dog Creole

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Tavina](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tavina/gifts).



> Hello Tavina!! I hope you enjoy this! I also love these weird fucking gremlins. So I made them... weird fucking gremlins, haha.

“Kakashi,” Kurenai said, smiling in a way that several younger jōnin in the lounge attempting to surreptitiously scoot away. Kakashi continues to stare down at his book and contemplates the pros and cons of making a break for the window. 

Pro: he’s faster than Kurenai so he’ll definitely make it. 

Con: she _will_ track him down, and the finding will make her madder. 

Pro: he won’t have to deal with whatever he- ...he hasn’t actually done anything, lately. Or at least, nothing that would impact Kurenai enough to make her approach him with that smile on her face. So, his genin then.

Pro: he won’t have to deal with whatever it is the brats have done, which is a _large_ pro. Surely when they graduate from genin he doesn’t have to pay for their mistakes anymore. Surely. That’s definitely in the fine print of being a jōnin sensei somewhere; it has to be, or no one would ever take the job.

Con: if he - hey, wait. Kurenai _likes_ his brats. People who like his brats aren’t allow to complain about them. Not to his face, at least. 

Kakashi lifts his eye to look at Kurenai when she comes to stop in front of him. Her hands are on her hips. Behind her, Anko - oh no, Kakashi definitely should have taken the window when it was still an option. Damn. Anko looks _gleeful_. Whatever hell is about to rain down upon him, Kakashi’s gonna make damn sure it falls upon Sasuke and Shikako as well. If need be, he’ll corner them in ANBU headquarters. He still has pull there; Tenzō will help.

“Maa, Kurenai, it’s been a while.” He eye smiles at her, gratified that he can feel her irritation spike up a notch. He’s sure that some people would be attempting to deescalate in a situation like this, but where’s the fun in that?

There’s the click of a camera, and Kakashi opens his eye, slightly puzzled. A polaroid camera, the picture already being pushed out through the bottom slot. Kurenai pulls it free and holds up the slowly developing image of Kakashi eye smiling innocently. She walks over to the corkboard hanging on one of the walls. It’s full of innocuous things like kittens for trade or sale, flyers for restaurants, coupons for - oh hey, half off at Ichiraku’s*. Kakashi’s suddenly at Kurenai’s side, reaching over to grab the Ichiraku’s coupon. Someone’s tacked a note that says _blatant favouritism >( _ over the top. 

Kakashi crumples the note and tucks it away to throw at Genma later.

Kurenai utilises the now free tacks to pin a piece of paper to the board, and then Kakashi’s picture in the middle of it. Then she steps away and Kakashi raises an eyebrow at what she leaves behind. It reads:

**⇩BAD INFLUENCE⇩**

_The picture of Kakashi, smiling in what he thinks is a very wholesome manner._

DO NOT LEAVE UNATTENDED AROUND ~~IMPRESSIONABLE~~ GENIN, CHŪNIN, ACADEMY STUDENTS AND QUITE FRANKLY TOKUBETSU JŌNIN AND JŌNIN AS WELL.

Anko’s cackling is loud and wild in the background. Kakashi tilts his head to look at Kurenai. 

“There’s a mistake.” He says, pointing to the struck out word.

“It’s stylistic.”

“I’m innocent.”

“And I’m in charge of a team of well reasoned young adults who _don’t_ get into Lucky Sevens shenanigans at the drop of a hat!” Kurenai isn’t shouting but she’s also… not _not_ shouting. It’s a tricky line to walk, but she’s doing it. Kakashi visibly turns his head between Kurenai and the malicious slander she’d just tacked up to the wall, and smiles.

“First round on me?” 

“First _three_ ,” She hisses, and Kakashi protests, even as he follows her and Anko out of the jōnin lounge to their favoured bar. They pick up a couple more jōnin and tokubetsu on their way, and by the time they take their seats Kakashi’s decided that he only agreed to pay the first three rounds to Kurenai (...and Anko) so everyone else is on their own.

There are many places that Kurenai could start her story. Here are a few:

_These kids_ , Kurenai thinks as she watches her newly minted genin do team bonding, _are so fucking weird_. Kiba’s too loud by half, and then amps it up a decibel when anyone says anything - so, typical Inuzuka. Shino’s quiet but he isn’t shy; raised Aburame collar hiding a sharp tongue. Hinata is shy, and quiet, and lacks any self-confidence, but the last one is just a matter of training and encouragement. 

And keeping her away from the rest of her shitty family, but Kurenai can only do so much, there. 

They’ll even each other out soon enough, Kurenai knows from her own team experiences. They just have to get to know each other well enough first. Thus, mandatory team bonding after training. All three of her genin are covered in dirt and sweat and grass stains. 

What they’re doing now, sitting in a loose circle - Kurenai included - is something she’s assumed happened when Inuzuka are placed on semi-permanent teams. He’s teaching them the meanings of different barks and growls yips that he and Akamaru pass between them. Kurenai’s met a few ninja who are permanent squad members with Inuzuka and they can certainly follow the sounds that pass between the Inuzuka and their ninken; catching enough to understand the gist if not individual words.

Kurenai has also met a ninja who she would have sworn up and down was an Inuzuka by birth. Akira growled and yippied and barked at the huge grey and brown dog who seemed glued to their side just as well as any Inuzuka, had that same loud, wild laughter. They respond to the name Inuzuka just as well as their team mates do. Civilian born ninja, Kurenai has worked out over the years, tend to go one of two ways when teamed with the more animalistic Clans like Inuzuka, Aburame, Onikuma, (Hatake). 

One, they request a transfer as soon as physically possible. (Which isn’t always accepted, and usually leads to them falling headfirst into the other option, regardless of their intentions or wants.)

Two, they get _weird_. 

As an example, Akira. Who dresses, walks, talks (and fucks, apparently, but you did _not_ hear that from Kurenai who definitely didn’t hear that from《redacted》) like an Inuzuka after more than a decade and a half attached to a squad with two Inuzuka. Or Satsuki who Kurenai met when they were both genin, who was a perfectly nice if slightly gruff kunoichi from a civilian family. Now, after several years partnered with an Onikuma, she’s starting to approach Anko levels of weird and creepy. And she can’t even _do_ the whole ‘demon bear shadow possession’ thing.

So Kiba beginning to teach them how to understand the general idea of what Akamaru’s saying - what danger sounds like, what’s the all clear, warning signals, how to count like a dog - that’s not weird. Kurenai’s spent a lot of time shuffled between teams, a large percentage of which featured Clan ninja. She knows how to get along with them. She’s not Clan, but she’s not civ born either.

What she thinks probably is weird is the way Kiba and Hinata have convinced Shino to do the same. 

Kurenai did not know that the human throat could make those sounds. 

“This is the first noise I will teach you. Why? Because it means safe.”

Shino makes a low humming buzz that reverberates in his chest and echoes around the clearing slightly. Hinata makes what Kurenai thinks to be a fairly passable attempt, but Shino ducks his head into his collar to hide what is very obviously a smile. The sound both Kiba and Akamaru make is clearly a growl and Hinata giggles as well this time. Four sets of eyes turn to Kurenai, who blinks, before clearing her throat.

“Bzzz,” She tries. “Zzzzz,” She tries again, trying to pitch her voice lower. It makes her throat feel weird. Shino repeats the noise a few more times, which they do their best to mimic. 

It’s Kiba’s turn next, and they go back to deciphering a particularly high pitched half yip half yelp that means ‘run.’

And then back to Shino. For. Chittering noises. Which Hinata _nails_. Kurenai understands - well she doesn’t _understand_ , but - how Shino’s making those noises. Clan stuff. But how the _fuck_ is _Hinata_ making that sound?

(It takes them about a month and a half to make some sort of weird bug-dog creole. These kids, man. Inventive, creative, innovative - so weird.)

  
  


But maybe that’s a little too far back? Try this:

_Shikako,_ all three of her students have said at one point or another, _is so cool!_

Okay, so the wording changes depending on who’s saying it, but that’s what it boils down to. And Kurenai will admit it herself - the Nara girl is pretty cool. Anko likes her, which is a large point in her favour. She hasn’t spent too much time with Nara Shikako herself, but they’ve met a few times and the up and coming seals mistress is… interesting. 

In a good way! A very good way. She helped Hinata with her confidence (a joint project between several of Hinata’s agemates, Kurenai knows), helped Anko with her jōnin project, is a smart and perceptive young ninja who also has the capacity to absolutely annihilate her enemies. Also she hates Kurenai’s dad.

So overall, Kurenai likes her, even if they’re more acquaintances than friends.

But Kurenai is so very glad that the girl isn’t on her team. First, Kurenai would never swap any of her genin for anything, so she couldn’t even begin to imagine what her team would look like minus one of her weird, quiet-loud chittering, barking stalkers and plus one potentially undying disaster magnet. 

Second, that thought leads to imagining being in charge of all the Lucky Sevens and. No. Just no. Each one of those kids - the Uchiha, the Uzumaki, the Nara - are omens of luck. Not necessarily bad or good, just _luck_. They’re all little chaos gremlins and it serves Hatake right to get stuck with them. No matter how hard he hides behind his nonchalant, mysterious, aloof persona, Kurenai can see right through him.

The man is an absolute disaster, and he can keep his chaos gremlins and their trouble far, _faaaar_ away from Kurenai’s own stalker gremlins.

  
  


You may think _‘chittering, barking stalkers’_ is a bit harsh, but may I present to you:

Conversations Yūhi Kurenai Did Not Hear 

or

Team Eight, You Know Your Sensei Can Hear You, Right? 

⃠

“Ramen today?” Kiba asks, which is weird, because Kurenai’s pretty sure that Kiba didn’t have any strong opinions on ramen.

“Oh! If you’re sure, Kiba.” Hinata says, sweet smile on her face.

“I disagree. Why? Because Nara Shikako and Uchiha Sasuke were loudly arguing with Uzumaki Naruto when I saw them on my way to training this morning. Their topic was about where they would be eating lunch, and I do not believe that Naruto was winning the argument.”

“Aw, don’t look so down Hinata! We can watch him eat another day!”

⃠⃠ **BAD**

Kurenai’s almost out of hearing range when she hears,

“Pretty sure Team Seven got the river cleaning D-rank this morning. Wanna go see if Naruto’s fallen in?” Kiba cackles, obviously at the thought of his friend(?)’s misfortune.

“Judging by past history, relating to incidents at the Academy, this would mean that Uzumaki has removed his jacket and, most likely, his shirt.” Shino adds. Hinata, Kurenai has turned back to see, has turned bright red. She takes off at a fast clip towards the river. Kiba and Shino fist bump as she goes.

“If he hasn’t fallen in yet, we can always push him!” Kiba calls after her. Hinata makes a sound - halfway between dog and bug, a weird growly chitter - and Shino and Kiba jerk and run after her.

⃠ **BAD**

Hinata’s looking distinctly embarrassed. Uzumaki Naruto, Kurenai knows both through the grapevine and her own team, has left for an extended training mission which is slated to last years. It doesn’t surprise her to know that Hinata went to see him off; the red cheeks aren’t a shock either. Despite her growing confidence, she’s still a shy twelve year old sometimes.

“Man, now what are we gonna do?” Kiba grumbles.

“In what sense?” Shino asks, patting Hinata’s shoulder gently if stiffly. One of his bugs skitters from his sleeve and onto Hinata’s shoulder. Kurenai loses sight of it as it disappears into Hinata’s hair. The girl smiles up at Shino, even through her red face.

“I mean, half our non-training, non-mission time was spent helping Hinata stalk Naruto. Now what are we going to do?” Hinata, who’s blush had been fading, turns bright red again.

“Ah. I see. Would you like to paper, scissors, rock for who gets to decide our next stalking target?” Shino deadpans.

Or maybe, Kurenai thinks, watching Shino hold out a hand for paper, scissors, rock, he’s being serious. Kiba sticks out his own fist. Hinata’s watching them both with wide eyes, skin almost back to it’s usual pale hue, only the faintest hint of pink lingering around her cheekbones. 

Kurenai turns and leaves the clearing before she gets to see who the winner is. She was going to have lunch with her genin, but suddenly finding Anko is seeming like the best option.

⃠ **BAD**

“We’re a team of trackers!” Kiba says, frowning. “And we can’t find one guy?” He’s pouting now, throwing himself onto the grass.

“It’s okay, we’ll find him for you. Sooner or later.” Hinata smiles, rubbing a hand through Akamaru’s fur, where he’s curled on Shino’s lap.

Kurenai hasn’t assigned them any tracking missions recently, which means…

“As I won paper scissors rock best out of seven, I had assumed it was up to me to find the next target for our team bonding activities.” Shino says. 

“Man, you took too long. When you find someone to stalk, then we’ll stalk your person. For now, we’re stalking Sai.”

“Once we find him.”

“Yeah, once we find him.”

⃠ **BAD**

Kurenai officially doesn't want to know. She has tried. Good lord has she tried. She's lectured them, tried to have casual talks, doing her best to explain that stalking people is bad. It just... doesn't seem to sink in. They nod and agree with her points, and then they just do what they want anyway. Apparently, teaching them how to more effectively stalk someone does not help to enforce her message, even though that is absolutely _not_ what she's doing. Trying to tell them that just gets her an extensive list of every tracking/hunting tip or trick which she's taught them that they've found useful in pursuit of their targets.

(One of them says something about Asuma. Another mumbles the name Anko. The third grins, unrepenetant. Kurenai disowns them.)

Here’s a place Kurenai definitely won’t be starting her story with, but is perhaps the most accurate:

_At least_ , Kurenai had thought affectionately, watching her weird, weird kids train, _at least they’re not Team Seven._

Which, according to the laws of the universe, is when things started to go wrong.

“We received a tracking mission, for some merchants.” Is where Kurenai actually starts her story. “Halfway there, Kiba says _‘oh man, I forgot to tell you guys. Shikako was showing me a technique she got from Kakashi-sensei_ -’”

Snickers break out around the table. While no one knows exactly the shit show that Kurenai’s about to lay out for them, they can see the general shape already. Truly, a talented story teller. Kakashi turns a page in his book, committing the details of Kurenai’s story to memory in order to recount them at training later. Shikako and Sasuke (and Tenzō, who turns up more often than not, now) will find it hilarious. 

And it _is_ hilarious. 

Kurenai’s ability to mimic the sounds of both ninken and kikaichū is both impressive and disturbing. Are non-Clan human throats supposed to be able to hum and chitter like that? 

It’ll be nice to see his brats laugh. Even nicer to watch them pale and scramble their way through his and Tenzō’s hell training. Kakashi needs to take revenge for the six drinks Kurenai and Anko squeezed out of him, after all. 

(Sometimes, Shikako pauses for a moment when she teaches her friends a new tip or trick. The hair on the back of her neck stands on end. Some sort of sixth (seventh?) sense shivers along her skin. This, she realises, will be trouble. And so Shikako says -

_I learnt this from Kakashi-sensei!_

\- and gleefully evades of any of the resulting fallout. It hasn't failed her yet! ...She still hasn't figured out a foolproof way to escape retribution from Kakashi-sensei yet, unfortunately.)

  
  
  


Ichiraku’s Summer Sale! Half price for valid coupon holders!*

*Half price on Ichiraku’s entire ramen range, limit of two bowls per coupon holder^

^Members of Team Kakashi allowed up to four bowls per coupon

**Author's Note:**

> I think this is written in a weird style. It certainly *feels* different to my other works?? Idk man. I enjoy it, regardless.


End file.
